Diary of a Dysfunctional Relationship

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March 10, 2013 by little hurdles big race

It’s just like a movie.  I feel like I’ve always known you and I can’t remember my life without you.  You’ve been there for my happiest occasions and my saddest days.  You always give me that boost I need whenever I’m with you.

But people tell me that you are not good for me.  Which seems odd because I’m sure all my friends like you, but I think they talk about us behind my back.  They say our relationship is too close, that you are not good for me physically or mentally.  I do feel a rush when I am with you and I feel run down when we are apart.  Is this co-dependency?  Its confusing.  I see other women on TV with similar relationships and they have been through interventions, classes, and crying.  Are we really that bad?

I’ve been told you also have a chemical dependency problem. When you are pure and clean you are robust and vibrant, but when you inject additives you are oh so sweet and irresistible. When you are at your healthiest I find you boring and mundane. This really must be co-dependency. We both crave each other at our worst.

You do listen to me when I need you – but you really don’t offer any help. You cheer me up – but you also feed my depression. You like me no matter what – but shouldn’t you be more concerned about my heath?  In small doses you can be very good – but is that possible?  You make me feel like I’m the only girl in the world – but now I know I can pull back that curtain and find so many others waiting for your attention.

So, I have to accept it – you are like a drug to me.  It started off so innocent and pure and became this downward spiral into addiction.  Is this the same as alcohol and drug addiction? Do I cut you out cold turkey?  Do I try and take back the reigns you have over me?

Chocolate – you’re a bad boyfriend.