Childhood Baggage

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October 20, 2013 by little hurdles big race

A friend of mine posted this on FB today.  It pretty much speaks for itself – you can take many messages away from this short.

But for me, it has shaken me to the core.  It took me until College to really feel like I belonged – to feel like I had finally found a group I fit in and fit me.  I did not have an unhappy childhood and I was not an outcast in school – but I never really felt like I belonged.  I still struggle with those feelings of insecurity as an adult.  It’s the great irony of being told you are an inspiration when you usually feel like a disappointment.  It’s irrational, I know, but that’s the long-term effect of those scars you are told to cover up as a child.

I have also struggled to answer the question of why I decided to change my life in April of 2010 – this video has given me the closest answer I have so far.  I wanted to be seen for who I really am instead of what I looked like. I wanted to start living the life I knew I deserved and accomplish things everyone told me I could not do.  I did not want to be forgotten.

I don’t mean to be such a downer today.  The message is this – if you don’t like your life then change it.  If you cant see you are beautiful then get a new mirror.  You are not alone – there are millions struggling with your same hardship – find your voice and find support, it is closer than you think.  You are not that little kid on the playground – you are more than what they see.

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Stand up and be counted.  You’ve only got one chance to live life to the fullest.